What an intricate, arduous word.
Merriam-Webster Dictionary (because I'm a nerd who likes to look up words) defines the noun "Expectation" as:
1. A belief that something will happen or is likely to happen.
2. A feeling or belief about how successful, good, etc., someone or something will be.
Alongside the official definition, I think we all have different personal definitions for the word as well.
For me, in the past this word has been defined with the description of "disappointment and failure."
I was disappointed in the failures of myself and others. I began to no longer expect because so many times when I had I was left disappointed and licking the wounds I either inflicted on myself or was caused by others' lack of care.
However, for a long time I did hold unfair expectations over other people. I was becoming emotionally dependent on them for love and emotional satisfaction. It was around age 18 that the Lord came to with a revelation that radically changed my life:
He said,
"Hanna, true love has no expectations. When I died on that cross, I did not expect you to pay back that deed because I already knew you couldn't. Love only hopes. It always hopes (1 Cor. 13). Stop placing unfair expectations on yourself and others and choose hope instead."
Expectations on people often leaves us hurt. Expectations on situations often leaves us confused. Expectations on events often leaves us unsatisfied.
I briefly shared a couple posts back that the Lord told me to come to Amsterdam with no expectations.
That has been one of the most liberating experiences of my life.
It is in that place of open hands, staring into the burning eyes of my Savior I am able to receive the gifts of people and ministry he has in store for me.
You can't receive gifts with the closed fists of control, expectation and distrust.
To truly experience the full joy of receiving a gift there must be an element of surprise and unexpectancy. Think of a time when you were expecting a certain gift but instead were given another. Even if it was a good gift, the expectancy of the other dulled the joy of receiving what was actually given to you.
The same applies in expecting the way things will go in the future. In order to receive the fullness of joy in this life there needs to be a decrease of expectation in our lives and replace it with an increase of hope and thankfulness.
For no where in Scripture does God ask us to expect, but He does ask us to hope.
Proverbs 10:28:
"The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish."
Psalms 71:14:
"But I will hope continually and will praise you yet more and more."
Romans 12:12:
"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."
Romans 15:13:
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."
Hebrews 6:19-20:
"We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain, where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf, having become a high priest forever after the order of Melchizedek." (ESV)
Now that sounds all nice and simple. Like, "Oh! Great! I just need to no longer expect and trust God in hope knowing he will give me good gifts." ...but it's not that easy, is it?
Laying down expectations means laying down your own ideas of how things should be and radically trusting the Lord. Even when we face situations like disease, divorce and death.
Now I don't know about you, but for me--a Type-A, always like to have a "5-year plan" kind of person--laying down expectations feels like scrapping off my own flesh in total vulnerability before the throne of Jesus and coming to a place of complete dependency on him.
But it's in that place I've found the most joy.
It's in that place I've experienced the most peace.
It's in that place I've experienced the most gentleness, love and contentment.
It's in the place of the unknown I've felt the most known.
So will you join me in learning what it means to lay down expectations and replace them with hope in God?
Will you join me, dear brother and sister, in choosing to let go of disappointment and replace it with thankfulness?
Will you join me in choosing freedom and joy to receive gifts instead of bitterness?
Jesus, thank you for loving me with no expectations. Thank you for giving me joy instead of bitterness, and thank you that there are always gifts to be thankful for. I am inspired by you to let go, trust and keep my hands open to receive the gifts you have for me.
I love you.
Love, Hanna